little birds i am sorry for being gone so long
but mostly sorry for not commenting on all of your lovely posts
and they truly were lovely
sorry sorry sorry

autumn is in the air but i will sadly miss summer
i will go for one last swim this weekend
i don't care how cold it is

i've started school again and i've turned 20
20 is a scary age
i don't know how i feel about it
my teen years are gone and i don't think i made the most of them
but i guess i have a fresh new decade to change things

i feel like i am moving slower than everyone around me:
like i will always be terrified of driving
never know what i want to do with my life
never go out like other girls
never find a nice boy

-i must be more positive-

i hope you are all well and enjoying the end of summer (or winter)

Love Always,



Karolina said...

don't worry I feel like I didn't make much of my teen years as well, but now I'm working to make that up to myself! And don't worry, driving is scary for me too :)


not wendy said...

I feel so similarly, Sara, except I recently became a teenager. I still want to be a child, but a part of me can't wait to grow up.

Yes, we must think positive thoughts! :)

elly said...

Such pretty photographs.
I'm so glad you've resolved to be positive! I'm sure this decade will be so wonderful for you!

magnoliaamber said...

Hi Sara! I have just turned 21 and it is not scary anymore, when I was 20 I was scared, but now I am adjusting better and accept myself better. Life has been easier. Don't worry about finding the right boy, because finding the right one is always difficult...

E said...

dearest, you will find the right people into your life, i am sure of that. actually, you don't even have to search for them, because they will come. for some reason, the life exposes itself more reluctantly to people like me and you, it wants to hold on to the mystery. it can be frustrating, but we should remember to be patient. and in the meantime we can dream and our dreams will come true.

The Storyteller said...

I'll tell you the truth, being 20 changed everything, but it was a good change, a necessary one. Don't be afraid of change - it most always bring good things.
Always find the bright side love, its the best way to be.

xoxo thestoryteller

scraped elbows said...

Dear Sara I am so so glad you have posted again, I really missed you! Happy belated birthday too! And I know exactly how you feel 'like i will always be terrified of driving
never know what i want to do with my life
never go out like other girls
never find a nice boy' these words sum up myself exactly. i hope you are well and keeping positive, lots of love <3 xxx

scraped elbows said...

p.s. your photographs are beautiful xx

Megan said...

I am so so glad you posted, I have missed you so dearly. Thank you for your comments, they mean more than I could ever say.
I hope you had a wonderful birthday, do not worry about getting older. It may seem like you have left your teenage years but don't look back with doubts and longing. Embrace where you are now. I hate adolesence, I would very much like to be a few years older.

The last paragraph, I feel, is about me also (i know it is).
I have always been behind the others, I seem to need to hold on longer.
Do you have anxiety problems too Sara? I have anxiety, and it is such a knot inside and it stop me from doing so many things (like going out or finding a nice boy).
We must be brave and scare ourselves sometimes.
I am sure you will find a nice boy Sara, you are so lovely and beautiful, you really are. Please remember that.
The photographs are beautiful, and I am so glad to hear from you.
Lots of love,
Megan xx

Pink Lady said...

Beautiful pictures! I love your blog!!!

~Abby~ said...

Beautiful pictures. =)
Ahhh I love autumn; I am so ready for it!
Don't worry you're not alone on the way that you are. I like to stay home & just enjoy the simple things while the other 15 year old girls like to...well you know.


erin meagan said...

i'm starting my senior year tomorrow, and i'm already nervous for next year. oh boy.
i'm also from there! :)

Clara said...

Dear Sara,
turning 18 has me feeling the same way, with my soul all in knots. with the same worries as well, it's so hard to stay positive and bright. but we can, we must.

I can hardly wait to recive your letter! Don't worry, I don't mind the wait, I'm sure it will be well worth it. I tend to procrastinate to much as well.

much love always, Clara

Karolina said...

I cried the first time that I was getting a tattoo, and I believe that this time isn't going to be much different. But theres no shame in that.. right? :D
But it's totally worth it!


Tia Daisy said...

Deer Sara, your blog is always a breath of fresh air and natural beauty. I do hope all your hopes and fears get resolved. I am 20 too and I think it's a wonderful age, I'm so glad to be out of my gloomy teenage years. A new decade gives you a fresh start; be who you want to be. :)

Athena. said...

Dearest Sara, I am always overjoyed when you post! Turning 16 has left me feeling similarly worried; but remember - we are dreamers - and I hope you never forget how incredible you are.
Love, always, Athena. xxx

Natasha Natalie said...

I'm 19, turning 20 in a few months. I know the feeling well - I feel like I didn't make the most of my teen years either. But as you said, you have a fresh new decade to change things! Keep your head up, love.

frenchtoile said...

I just turned 19 last month.
and I thought 14 was a scary age to turn!
I know how you feel.
For me its like I want to hide myself from the world.. keep myself safe. Safe in my world of dreams.
Im so glad I found your blog, its a comforting place to visit, and I like how honest your posts are.